Friday, 15 January 2016


Only a few weeks into 2016 and already the shit is hitting the fan.

Queen Elizabeth II set the mood by reportedly having a mini breakdown during the recording of her Christmas Day speech and conceding that this would be her last Christmas.

“I hope you enjoy your final Christmas,” she snapped bitterly to the camera.

She's knows more than anyone that 2016 is the year the Windsor Royal Dynasty ends.

Then of-course the Cancer (69) Deaths which have rocked the nation;

  • Lemmy
  • David Bowie
  • Alan Rickman

Already Conspiracy Theorists are calling foul. While Chris Spivey hasn't come out and said it in black and white, he has hinted in true Spivey style:

“So, for what it is worth I believe that Bowie is as dead as what we are, which having lived and breathed this shit for the past 3 years wasn’t hard to conclude just by the totally OTT media attempts to convince the world that the singer is brown bread.”

Mind you Chris Spivey has had to endure a terrible start to the New Year.

Having declared himself “celibate” and appealing for a “hand-job” from his loyal female readers; he's teased us with what he's got in store for us, while on the other hand defending himself for not publishing it yet.


  • “Keep watching this space because I have made some stunning discoveries that will rock your world and will all be meticulously detailed and evidenced in those forthcoming articles.”
  • “Despite all of this I have nearly completed an article on Paris which is far to big for one article and is going to need splitting in two. I am very pleased with it and delves deeper by far than any other article that I have seen. I take the whole hoax to pieces with information – as far as I am aware – never published before."
  • “Information that I accidentally came by leading to the flood gates opening on new information which I am busy writing up in two articles consisting of around 35,000 words in total so far which have the potential to topple the establishment if enough people read it. The information is indisputable and uncovers the truth behind one of the biggest events in history…”


  • “However, I can promise you that I am working harder than ever but bear in mind that I have on-going time consuming battles going on with court cases and the HCPC who are desperate to close the case against the social workers and I am determined not to let that happen with the help of my friend Christopher Ricketts.”
  • “The court cases are a nightmare because not only am I fighting the governments top legal minds, intent on stitching me up but I am fighting to make my solicitors do what I tell them to do as they have without doubt been got at.”
  • “To give you an idea of what i’m up against there, we have caught the prosecution making up their own subsection of the law which they needed to do to have justification for the conviction to stand.”
  • “On top of that, I am trying to keep the police from getting away with their criminal actions perpetrated against me and my family.”
  • “Obviously I didn’t work Christmas day and two days later I was in far to much agony to do so because I developed Septicemia.”
  • “That led to two suspect operations and kept me from doing any work at all for a further 9 days and then when I did resume I could only type with my left hand which is a nightmare at best of times for a right handed mush like myself made worse by the fact that my left hand has a maximum 70% function due to a trapped nerve in my left elbow.”
  • “To give you some idea what that means, I cant even hold a pen to write and just going for a piss is a major operation.”

While the nation mourned the death of David Bowie, the nation's grief was confounded even further when a breakfast radio presenter got it wrong by reporting David Cameron had died...

Announced on Heart FM radio by breakfast presenter Fiona Winchester, the British Prime Minister David Cameron has died at his home surrounded by his family.

While information is sketchy at the moment, whistleblowers within 10 Downing Street report he died following a stab wound to his back which punctured his heart.

Police are currently searching for Cameron's close ally and friend Chancellor George Osborne to help with enquires. No further information has been made public at this point.

Coming only days after damaging revelations were reported by BBC news of an imminent scandal which was posed to break, David Cameron cancelled all public appointments and over-sea trips.

Reported to be the biggest scandal in British history, the Serious Fraud Office (SFO) were said to be liaising with the British Army's Special Investigation Branch (SIB) to start making arrests of “prominent figures at the core of the British Establishment.”

Gordon Bowden, ex RAF officer has released a statement today claiming that following a 13 year investigation into corruption, he has uncovered detailed and forensic evidence suggesting billions and billions of pounds have been stolen from public funds, via the setting up of 250,000 phoney oil and gas companies registered from a few addresses in Finchely Road, London.

He said, “The United Kingdom is riddled with fraud.”

Speculation is rife that members of the Royal family have been implicated in the scandal and that Queen Elizabeth II and her husband Prince Phillip have been flown by helicopter to an undisclosed location.

Extra guards have been posted outside Buckingham Palace and 10 Downing Street.

Sir Bernard Hogan-Howe, the Commissioner of the Metropolitan Police has warned of mass public disruption once the full extent of the scandal is made public.
Buckingham Palace have yet to comment.

London Major Boris Johnson was last seen jumping on his bike saying, “I'm out of here mate!”


  • Question: What's worse than being declared dead?
  • Answer: Being called a Necrophiliac.

Hot on the heels of being announced dead on breakfast radio, Prime Minister David Cameron finds himself in renewed controversy having been accused of having sex with a dead child as part of an initiation into an ultra-secret society.

Months after publically denying claims by former Tory donor Lord Ashcroft that he inserted his penis into a dead pig's head, claims have surfaced in a popular 'Alternative blog' that “the truth of the matter is he actually fucked a dead child.”

Unable to verify the person or persons behind The Coleman Experience, the shocking claim was published on 21st December 2015 in a blog titled, “It ain’t over ’til the goy-fuckers swing.”

The damaging extract reads:

“David Cameron– all-round cunt who likes to hide his Jewish roots and is being blackmailed up to his fucking eyeballs. Was recently the subject of gossip that he was initiated into the Bullingdon club by fucking a dead pig. The truth of the matter is he actually fucked a dead child.”

10 Downing Street remain silent on this latest and most damaging claim of necrophilia and it would appear a news blackout has been ordered and is being adhered to, by a compliant national press.

How much longer David Cameron can survive in 10 Downing Street and avoid arrest is anyone's guess.

Its only a matter of time. Tick tock...


“Davey-boy is being blackmailed up to his eyeballs by Intel agencies and is controlled behind the scenes by Rupert Murdoch and Danny Finkelstein. He was recently subject to rumours that he performed a sex-act on a dead pig. We have it on good authority that it took place on a dead child.”

“Derek Laud is close chums with Camilla Parker Bowles and necophiliac David Cameron.”


It's really only a matter of time before David Cameron is arrested. It wouldn't surprise me if he ends his sorry days in the same manner as Saddam Hussein; namely swinging from a rope.


Closer to home, Sussex Police and Police Crime Commissioner Katy Bourne have been getting bashing.

Lee Lyons

The obvious question which no one has asked is why one person would need to contact 13 prostitutes to fulfil his sexual urge?

No one calls up to 13 prostitutes when one would provide the service he needs. Lee Lyon is obviously the designated pimp for Sussex Police, which in itself, explains his reason to appeal his dismissal.


Former Chief Constable of Sussex Police Martin Richards once asked me, “When is it going to stop?,” to which I answered, “Never...”


Sussex Police face renewed criticism for abandoning a disabled pensioner, citing the nightmare he finds himself in is a “civil matter”, excusing themselves of all obligation and responsibility.


The depths of Sussex Police's depravity, criminality and dishonesty knows no bounds. Take for example the Brighton Scandal which has everyone involved. Sussex Police, The Argus Newspaper and Brighton's MP's and other notable figures. No one is immune; everyone is involved in the coverup of a despicable and cruel smear against an innocent mentally ill man.


Don't say I never told you so, because I told you so and have been telling you since 2012 that Sussex Police is riddled with corruption; corruption which runs deep in its heart and soul.

Unable to control the tide of press interest turning against them, the latest scandal to hit is The Argus and Telegraph newspapers exposé that Sussex Police covered up child abuse scandals on the tiny island of St Helena in the South Pacific ocean.

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